‘I Haven’t Been Penetrated In Years’ - This Horny Woman Called 911, Begs Policeman For S*x

LOL, lemme laugh a little. Maria Montenez-Colon, of Punta Gorda, Fla., was arrested Friday night for misuse of 911 after she allegedly asked a responding officer for sex because she had not been 'penetrated in years.'. Brave woman, well done.

The NYdailynews reports that a Florida woman who described herself as "horny" allegedly summoned a cop to her home and tried to have sex with him pleading "I haven't been penetrated in years!"

Maria Montenez-Colon, 58, was arrested Friday night in the misuse of 911. The officer drove to her home in Punta Gorda after she reportedly told a dispatcher that she wanted her late husband's Corvette back after giving it to her son, authorities said.

"You can f--k me," she said, according to an arrest report obtained. She allegedly grabbed the cop's arm and tried to rub her hands across his chest so he told her that her behavior was inappropriate.

"I'm bad, I know," she replied, the report states.

Before leaving, the officer gave Montenez-Colon his business card and advised her to call the police department through a non-emergency line for non-emergencies.
Despite this advice, Montenez-Colon dialed 911 a second time to say the last officer "p-ssed her off" and asked to see another.

The original officer returned with a second officer. She explained again that she called 911 a second time because their first encounter infuriated her.

"He was a perfect gentleman, but when I asked him to f--k me, he turned me down so that made me angry."
The first officer asked if Montenez-Colon remembered their conversation about not using 911 in non-emergency circumstances.

"I do," she allegedly said, "but how else am I going to get you to f--k me?"
Montenez-Colon was arrested, handcuffed and booked into Charlotte County Jail.